The Viewing Files: Water, Water, Everywhere...

With a week of rain coming up it seems kind of appropriate then to do a post of water movies.  Or at least movies featuring water.  Lots and lots of water.

So put on your wadders and gumboots, grab a hot drink and some cake and sit back for a wet ride.

 

Titanic

Starring: That guy from Hart to Hart

Original release: 1953

Synopsis: Boat meet iceberg, Iceberg meet boat

 

Oh look it's Robert Wagner singing.

 

Still the special effects are pretty amazing even if they did get some of the facts wrong.

River of No Return

Starring: Robert Mitchum and Marilyn Monroe

Original release: 1954

Synopsis: A farmer walks into a saloon...

 

Marilyn in jeans and doing it rough. And even then she manages to look amazing.

 

An okay sort of movie even if Mitchum comes across as a bit of Alpha Male bully occasionally. Still the other leading man is so much worse. One of those movies where men are men and women better bloody well put up with it or live like a man.

Jaws

Starring: A ton of familiar faces

Original release: 1975

Synopsis: Don't go into the water...

 

Or Three Men and a Shark.

A really big shark.

They so should have brought a bigger boat.

Das Boot

Starring: Some Germans

Original release: 1981

Synopsis: Life in a tin can... under the sea

 

One of the best war movies ever made.

A Night to Remember

Starring: English people

Original release: 1958

Synopsis: That iceberg is back...

 

Less sap than the previous Titanic movie and no singing so that's plus right there.  The special effects are pretty great too.

Cocoon

Starring: A bunch of old people

Original release: 1985

Synopsis: Aliens and old people

 

Okay in its day but now just kind of long and boring.

The alien bits (which sadly were few and far between) were really the only bits for me that worked.  The rest was all kinds of meh.

The Abyss

Starring: Ed Harris

Original release: 1989

Synopsis: More Aliens... hopefully they are friendly

 

It's romance under the sea with Ed Harris saving the day and a bossy Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonino. Throw in a storm and some aliens that actually don't want to eat you for a change and you've got a not half bad movie even if it's a tad long.

The Perfect Storm

Starring: George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg

Original release: 2000

Synopsis: Sometimes you really should listen to the weather forecast

 

Makes the "Deadliest Catch" and other similar TV shows look like a walk in the park.

Riveting stuff.

The Shape of Water

Starring: No idea

Original release: 2017

Synopsis: A different kind of love story... one with a fish

 

The real story of Aquaman and it's not pretty.

Titanic

Starring: Kate and Leo

Original release: 1997

Synopsis: The Titanic movie

The movie that gave us a thousand memes and one of the most annoying songs in history.

Still the visuals are pretty spectacular.